Opinion article by Duke of Shomolu, Joseph Edgar
I don’t really know what it is about me that attracts men. Sorry boys. Young boys almost my son’s age really liking me and wanting to have sex with me…
I must have to ask my ‘chi’ what is really wrong with me.
This has happened three times in my life. These are the ones who pick up courage and actually ask me. Others stare, send some stupid signals and wait for a full blooded ibibio man to come and ask to sleep with them.
They are still waiting.
So this time, he walks towards me as he is rushing for an assignment he is doing for me. His mien, his composure and his carriage tells me who he is.
He doesn’t even hide it. His confidence arouses my curiosity and I call him. I don find trouble.
I say,’ are you gay? He says yes. I say are you not afraid to tell me. He says No. I say why? He says because you look like someone who will understand.
I laugh. I say yea, I am beginning to understand your community but I am still curious as to how you can carry along in this society.
He is young, not tall, dark and bearded. He is from the East and there is something about him that suggests he needs cover.
His confidence is opaque as I can sense the ‘fear’ within him. His eyes looking into mine and I can see that he desperately needs to be understood and taken under my wings.
I continue… So how long have you loved men. He says ‘I was disvirgined by my married uncle’ wow. Your uncle? Where is he now? Abroad, he replied.
Did you tell anybody? He says NO because he enjoyed it. His struggle with his sexuality was brief. He always knew he was different and put up a limp fight.
He went for deliverance in churches but obviously didn’t want it to work because he was GAY in and out. So he gave up and plunged.
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His lovers come from different strata of society. From the big men to the young boys to the soldiers every where…
Married men, single boys, preachers and laymen they all visit his bed as he dispenses pleasure to them
So you won’t be with a woman I ask. I have been with a woman several times but if I am to make a choice, I’ll be with a man mostly. He answered.
Your parents? I have not told them but if they find out which they will soon find out I’ll tell them my truth.
I stare but not with the amazement of the first two encounters. The act is everywhere now and has taken over whole sectors- media, fashion, entertainment, and finance, name it.
In some places ‘normal’ heterosexuals are beginning to look like the ‘abnormal’ ones in Nigeria
So my mindset has moved from utter disgust to curiosity and tolerance.
Yes I still remain very curious as to how this could be possible. The sweetness of a woman discarded for the hardness and blandness of a man’s bottom. It really needs to be studied
Then I heard him, ‘ Edgar would you like a blow job? I say who? He say you. I say from who he say Me.
I say mbok don’t kill me with laughter. I am straight o. Very straight o. He says ‘ A mouth is a mouth.
I laugh. I say with all these beards that full your face my brother leave am.
I see a small look of disappointment on his face and ask him why he thinks I would like a blow job from him
He says because he has been watching me from afar. I send off a raw signal of sexuality that attracts both men and women. He has seen women stare at me and also.men stare at me.
My boldness and devil may care attitude is a strong elixir and my free spirit turns both sexes on
I say mbok how can we package these free spirit make we sell. School fees don nearly kill me. He laughs and makes his offer again
I say to him,’ bro my curiosity is born out of the need to tell this story. I am a writer. I am curious and intrigued and the need to understand you doesn’t push me to experience you. I feel compelled to write you.
He says ok. No problem but remain my friend.
I say of course and open my arms for a hug. He hugs me and puts his head on my chest and says thank you.
I watch him walk away. I can’t pity him. He says he has found himself who am I to judge. He loves himself and loves the feel of a man on his tiny body.
If that is his choice, who am I to judge. As for me, I knw where I stand o…
Nothing will shake me o. The curvy, soft body of a well made female will always be the main attraction to me.
But can we still judge?
*Duke of Shomolu*
